Up the creek without a paddle

The idea of recreating Jerome K Jerome’s literary journey down the Thames was not mine. Chris suggested it a couple of years ago whilst we were getting lost on the outskirts of Sheffield. I liked the idea, the book follows a route through towns I know well but at the time it was not logistically possible. This year I am spitting in the face of logistics and asked him if it was still something he wanted to do. He said yes and so we needed to find a mug to be our third. Paul was keen to join us.

There is a company in Walton-On-Thames that specifically hires out skiffs, they seem to do a good trade with period dramas and day rowers but clearly there are a number of groups that look to do this journey too. I only had to mention the book and they knew exactly what we required. That helped enormously for our strategy meeting. It was a successful meeting. We will be camping out at night, sleeping on the boat itself or in a tent next to it. There is a gas stove provided with the skiff for cooking. We also established that we are facing about 100 miles of upstream rowing over 5 days and will be passing through over three quarters of the locks on the Thames. In fact by the end of the night we were completely strategised, like Lords.

A recurring theme of this year is the “It seemed like a good idea at the time” syndrome. When looking for somewhere to escape the rain in the Steel City I imagined Spring sunshine, rolling fields and country pubs in the Thames Valley. Now I am thinking of 5 days of aching shoulders, sleepless nights, a constant feeling of grubbiness and having to go near Staines. I am looking out of the window at the bullets of rain and people fighting the wind. I can’t help but think we are maybe 120 years too late for the late spring/early summer Victorian comic escapades that Mr Jerome (“but you can call me Jerome”) painted. This is “Three Men in a Boat – Uncut”